Better Looking Than God

No matter who you are, this is something that has been weighing on my mind. People often talk about the fact they have put on some weight or they think they are ugly but at the end of the day, if you want me to make you feel better, I can.

I shall do this by simply pointing out that you, all of you (well maybe not you...) are better looking than God. It's true. And I'm not just saying that because God is thousands of years old and that's bound to take its toll, I am saying it in the sense that you are all better looking than God when God was in his prime.

And this is why.

God made man in his own image. He did. We all know that. Now I don't know how many of you have seen any of those caveman documentaries but they are pretty ugly beings. And I by pretty ugly, I mean horrendous. An this is what God looked like if he made man in his own image. There's a reason the phrase 'God awful' exists and this is why.

So if you are having a bad hair day or whatever, just console yourself with the feeling that you are better looking than God and you also never wasted your time inventing the panda.